Religion Rant

My mother would disown me. At any thought that religion is a barrier. Sometimes hindering people who are capable of more. Now in this rant I’m not saying religion isn’t helpful, false or bad for society. What I will point out is this it is dying, or finding its way to the back of the closet. The bible points out these are the signs of the last days. Let’s get back on track. 

Religion, it’s a belief that something above us, is watching our every moment. Some believe there is a God. I am a part of the some, my mother raised her children to be God fearing. And God fearing I am. But there were always questions about the catorgies of right and wrong. Wants and desires. Giving versus taking, and poverty versus wealth. The concepts always had me wondering. Are the rich blessed, do they wake up rich? Is their faith better than mine? Should I work to get rich or will it come to me? The poor are poor because they have less faith, right? They sin way too much? I don’t want to sin way too much but my rich friend sins a great deal, are my sins in a different category? Does he sin and repent? I wanted what we kept praying for in church, the cars and the house. The stuff we saw on music videos, and I would think if I didn’t believe in God would I have that stuff? Mind you my mother raised me to be a God fearing man. How do I get what the rich seemed to be blessed with? Why are the poor left wanting? Questions were asked but the answers never made sense. You just have to believe?!? What does that mean?

The bigger picture came when I move to my dads house. By that time I was 15 and trying to find myself. My mothers house had way too many rules, and I was resenting everything, questioning everything. My fathers house offered a freedom feeling. A carelessness to life. Let life lead and be lead. Excited about the possibility of this newness, I experimented with everything I could. Challenging my religious beliefs and doing what I thought was living. My father was not really religious, but believed in God. He would always say believe in God and everything would be alright, and that usually happened on his advice speeches. What does that even mean? But with that said I’d believe in God and still do what I wanted never really understanding the conflict between my mothers was of thinking and my fathers way. I would feel guilty for stealing, then feel joy for not getting caught. Then feel confused about why I would even put myself in that situation, this thinking bible versus- thou shall not steal. But living with my father over the years created the drive for things. I wanted everything I thought I couldn’t have. And I was getting them. I’d see my past and feel bad that I was so emotionless. I gave no care as to who I had to hurt to get what I wanted. Besides its going to be okay, if I can’t have it, I’ll have a fit. If somebody else got what I wanted I’d hold a grudge. But throughout all this gain my mindset never got out of the emotional guilt I would bear for obtaining material things. Constant war with religion and how I interpreted my mothers way of thinking versus my fathers versus my own. I was never happy. The thrill of obtaining filled a void, after the conquest I would go back into a mood of woe is me. I was truly never happy. The type of self-destruction would eventually, cause me lose it all. 

So we ask what does religion have to do with this? Well everything and nothing. Anytime we learn a new subject in whether in school or at work, we usually study it until it becomes habit. We want to know everything about the subject so we aspire to become subject matter expects. The problem with religion is we aren’t subject matter expects. We become delusional to our wants and desires. Religion teaches us many things, but many things are taken out of context. We use what will benefit us. And disregard what we feel isn’t important. We create mental blocks as to why something didn’t go our way and focus so heavily on something that won’t last. Example car, house, job. We in turn think our laziness will be rewarded the harder we pray, we label it sacrifice. 

So why does religion work for some and not others? Since we used to be a God fearing nation. We believed in the terms of war. Take what we feel is ours. After reading the meek shall inherit the earth- Bible. I’ve started to get this evolution of understanding. Warriors die and those who are left are the meek. Not every one goes to war. Not every warrior dies, but the meek do inherit the earth. I always thought that bible versus was saying let others walk over you, sit back do nothing and you will get what was suppose to be for them. Their riches will be yours. Which you can believe what you want but that’s totally not the case. Being meek doesn’t mean you have to be a pushover. Or passive aggressive. That’s just one example of how religion can work against people. If you don’t understand what you’re learning and you’re relying on somebody else’s interpretation, you become their slave. Just like in school you studied for tests or did homework on your free time, many religious followers don’t put in much effort outside their place of worship. 

We can’t let religion create barriers, but some will. Others will feed off the weak minded, and further give religion it’s burial. The more self help teachings that are created the less people are going to places of worship to find their answer to life. A cycle in which the Greeks saw Gods and Goddess turn into myths. Religion is in danger falling into a myth. People have and will continue to question their faith and wonder why they are struggling. Resentment will grow, and religious leaders will be blamed. And our dear religion will be left defenseless because, the end is near, and people aren’t taking the time to understand what they believe in. I’m a God fearing man. I had to understand what I believed in, and with that understanding came a calmness in which im still learning how to be calm. The confusion or paradox that I felt with my mothers way and fathers way are still there, but I admit that we might not think the same about religion. But I am truly happier with the path I am finding is good for me. 



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