Conversations With Self

Are you going to lie to me?
I might depending on the topic
So you could be lying?
Depending on the topic
So how do I know you’re lying?
You might not know
So I shouldn’t talk to you about my feelings?
You could
Fuck it, I don’t really care
So you care a lot then
Listen geez I do care but I can’t articulate my feelings
So you care but you don’t know how to say it?
Yes.
Ok what’s on your mind?
I don’t know how to be normal
Whoa wait is this some deep shit?
No. Just semi deep hear me out
Ok
I feel like I can’t express myself normally, like everything said doesn’t come out like its suppose to.
So why does this bother you?
Cause I don’t feel like people understand me, I have to watch what I say to fit in.
Ok. So do you want to fit in?
Yes.
Why?
Cause it’s normal.
So you want to be normal and fit in to better yourself is what I’m hearing?
Yes?!? No?!? Kinda… Idk what to do.
So conceal… Just focus on what you can control and be the image people want you to be.
Again?
It worked before so why fix what’s not broken, just don’t let people inside and see your struggle
Okay. Is this sound advice?
Look at it this way. You’re losing if you say everything on your mind
True…
So way bother being expressive?!?
I thought it was a talk track
It is but realizing the talk track is totally different in your head then others is what you are failing to realize.
So then conceal, and just talk to my therapist
Yes…
And this is the right thing to do
Yes…
This makes me normal and fit in
Yes…
Somehow I feel more confused
You just gotta find yourself and keep asking the right questions until you figure things out. More than one way to find solutions to questions. Risk it all…
Why couldn’t you say that before?
It seemed like you just wanted me to agree with you…
So you were lying?
No. I was listening and advising. Now I’m challenging you.

You’re welcome…

IMG_8051.JPG

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s